California

Months in advance I said I would post all about our journey to Los Angeles as it happened…but much like this trip, not a lot has gone exactly to plan. Things have happened one way or another but nothing quite right.
The flight out of Heathrow was fine. My first time flying but I loved it!! Just like the constant motion of a plane.

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Our 11 hour flight was killer on the jetlag but I didn’t quite feel it until later. Mine wasn’t the sort of jetlag people told me about like falling asleep in strange places…Whilst taking a dump in a public toilet… no, mine was a flood of emotion. Mostly bad ones. It was overwhelming.
Pulling up to the hotel and thinking this is it. This is 2 years worth of saving and planning and dreaming and we finally made it. Booked in. Looked around the room. Tried the bed. All okay.
Head over the road to get a drink and an american SIM card. Done. Head back and meet the locals. Done…wish it hadn’t. That just sent me off. I was scared and homesick and regretting it. All the money we spent wasted. Everything was wrong!!
So I cried…A lot.. I thought even more than I cried but came to the idea that we have to make the best of it.
So we started our days out;
Hollywood Boulevard.
Universal and City walk.
Six Flags.
Santa Monica.
And I’ve decided…its not that bad. Everywhere begins to feel like we belong. Everyone asks about our accent. Everyone notices us. It’s so foreign but so exciting. I never get bored of hearing; “so where are you from?” In that gorgeous American accent everyone had out here. Nic is loving it more than she thought she would which is a lot. She plans to return next year with her aunt hopefully. See it all again. Do it all again. Learn from this trip and make it better!
Me…I won’t be coming back. As I sit here on our hotel balcony looking out at the gorgeous pool with the lights on, listening to the crickets sing…I can’t imagine not looking up at the dusty blue sky as the sun sets behind the mountains, and palm trees litter the sky line.

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It’s so serene. So perfect. Everything I hoped it would be.
But there’s a point that you realise. Mine was today whilst walking along Santa Monica Pier. I can’t come back. Life is already getting in the way. I have to chose between driving and moving out and on with my life, or chasing an impossible dream to the other side of the world. I have no reason to return. I’ve done and will have done, all the things I truly wanted to do so why do I need to come back? Once is enough right… There’s no one to return for. There’s nothing that holds me here except the beauty of the hustle and bustle in a foreign dessert. That’s it. So as I count down the last 6 days here I will remember to keep looking out across the skyline. Remember the sight. Never forget it. This is it. California is so wonderful but life isn’t made to be perfect so I’ll enjoy what I have while it is here…

Dan -x-

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